#5 Networking authenticity over acquaintances
A valuable network comes from investing in your existing relationships, or by building genuine relationships with new people you meet. How? By having real conversations, whether online or in-person and showing genuine interest in the person you are speaking to.
I can’t tell you how many times people who wanted something from me, sought me out are already looking over my shoulder for the next person within one minute of conversation. I’m pretty sure I am not that boring!
Artifice is awful
Let’s face it, artificial conversation, those conversations that take place on the surface level “How are you? What do you do?” are generally useless to everyone involved. However, discussing things that you are interested in, have in common, and are passionate about, is going to be of interest to all parties.
Chances are you are meeting people in the context of a conference or an event, maybe a virtual mastermind or social media group, so there is already a common interest to discuss. Once you start talking you’ll quickly gauge if you hit it off. That’s your starting point. When we start thinking about the individual as a person and not just a ticket for sales, or a ticket into an organization, that’s when the real connection occurs.
Some of my best professional contacts came about because we clicked and then we took a real, personal interest in each other personally as individuals. We end up talking about our whole lives, cities we’ve lived in, families, interests, etc. The key is to take an interest in their whole life not just their professional life.
Real connections count
It doesn’t matter if you are introverted or extroverted for this process to be successful. Introverts will have longer deeper conversations with one or two people in the midst of a conference or party. Extroverts will have many more and perhaps shorter conversations with a lot more people. But both of these provide the opportunity to develop relationships and build real connections.
If you have a genuine interest then it won’t be difficult to remember something personal from the conversation, something that can be referred to when you follow up again in the future. When connecting after the event you can refer back to the conversation and the common interests, remember to add value, share a new article, or new information.
Don’t wait to connect with them again, online, or offline. A month after an event is too long to wait, you want the other person to remember you and the connection that was created. Check-in online or by text, drop a quick note on LinkedIn, share an article about the topic you discussed, anything that reconnects you.
Virtual authenticity
I am by Myers Briggs definition an Introvert, and consequently, I am traditionally not a phone person — ask my family and friends! Of course with social distancing, my hand has been forced and I am now a newly minted “phone person”. Zoom calls and the ability to see people face to face is a boon I could not do without.
It has also provided me with the opportunity to deepen my client relationships virtually. Between check-ins on how they are coping in the midst of the pandemic, offering support if they need it, as well as just having a few conversations online to catch up on their current personal state and their company’s next steps.
It has also enabled me to build new relationships across the world that I otherwise wouldn’t have had access to. The think tank, 9others was started in London in 2011 and allows individuals to share their biggest challenges and gain insights from other entrepreneurs. It was started by Matthew Stafford and Katie Lewis and expanded to communities across the world. Due to social isolation, 9others moved the dinners online and suddenly the mastermind group consisted of people from across the world.
Ten authentic connections with people you like and are genuinely interested in can take you further than a thousand connections with people whom you don’t know or don’t really care to know.
Happy connecting!
Feel free to ask questions or share your own thoughts and concerns on this feature page.
Join a live webinar for more in-depth LinkedIn tips or support via Patreon.
